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Archamedes
post Jan 9 2008, 04:50 AM
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The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take Into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct ... leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

So basically the moral of the story is, treat people badly and live life how you like because there is no need to repent at the end
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post Jan 9 2008, 04:50 AM
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kirin-rex
post Jan 9 2008, 08:04 AM
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That's profound. Definitely a keeper!


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"A Wise Man looks at a grain of sand and sees the Universe...
A Silly Man picks up a piece of seeweed, puts it around his neck and runs along the beach yelling: Look at me, I'm The Vine Man...

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SOUL-DRIFTER
post Jan 9 2008, 09:23 AM
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I know I read that before somewhere.
It is a good one.
Whoever thought that up had some time on their hands, and couldn't have done better on this one.
A real good chuckler.


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QUEST FOR THE REAL TRUTH
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Samurai
post Jan 9 2008, 03:31 PM
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(SOUL-DRIFTER;343745)
I know I read that before somewhere.
It is a good one.
Whoever thought that up had some time on their hands, and couldn't have done better on this one.
A real good chuckler.


Good joke.. It is interesting, I have found over the years that those that have an obession with proving hell does not exist, are usually the ones that are afraid that it really does. They seem to want to prove that there are not consequences to their actions, because it gives them justification to continue doing them. That is not a slam on anyone, just a simple observation.
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SOUL-DRIFTER
post Jan 9 2008, 04:42 PM
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(Samurai;343802)
Good joke.. It is interesting, I have found over the years that those that have an obession with proving hell does not exist, are usually the ones that are afraid that it really does. They seem to want to prove that there are not consequences to their actions, because it gives them justification to continue doing them. That is not a slam on anyone, just a simple observation.


An excellent point.


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callmecg
post Jan 16 2008, 09:09 PM
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That was great. I hope his/her professor had a good sense of haha.
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