No, not a thread like "do you drink or not" ... lame-o

The thing is, I turned 20 this year and I'm legal enough to drink (and do! now and then, at least), and I get offers to raves and parties with my cousin... well I'm a TINY girl and I don't have a strong alcohol-tolerance. Three 5% beers and I'm out cold. How do you say no when you're offered drinks? It feels bad when someone bought you something and you say no to it

Yesterday my cousine invited me to a beach rave (because wer're best friends, we hang out, since we were kids), and his friends kept buying me drinks until my cousin had to CARRY me home... I feel awful for not being able to say no due to courtecy

Tonight I have "no parents around" and my cousin is partying with all of his friends at my place, watching movies, eating snacks... like 80 beers with them... and I'm offered a beer here and there from random friends of my cousin

As I write this I am REALLY tipsy and I don't want to get any firther. I don't like getting drunk two nights in a row, but I also don't want to be impolite... and to make it worse... THEY'RE ALL FROM FINLAND. *cries* I don't want them to think I'm a wuss from passing out from 5 beers or so

I COULD tell them that I shouldn't have a beer or more a week since I take pills everyday (for mental stability), and shouldn't disrupt the cycle. But I feel ashamed if I had to say "Oh no... can't accept the beer, I got asperger, you know, I'm a psycho! Got to take mah medicine doo dee doo"

*sigh*

I hate the pressure from boys

If I don't take my medicine for 2 or 3 days I get severe anxiety attacks (which will probably happen since I can't take my seroxat tonight due to the beers I've had) and I REALLY don't want that... it means that when my bf wants to take me places, I am a chicken and want to stay home on a sunny day, just because I'm scared

I feel so stupid for writing all of this, so please don't mock me *cries* :cry:

Here where I live in the capital of sweden, everyone drinks during holidays, but everyone haven't got a syndrome or disorder. I just feel scared that I'll have anxiety attacks because of this

Dont worry D.B, If you just tell them, they should understand.

If ya dont want to get drunk, you shouldnt have to.

but they are racist, evil, gypsies.
finnish gypsies... the worst kind

the last finnish gypsie (finnish-rome) I knew murdered a guy from chilli (chilli people are their enemies appearantly) when he was 12! (I was 14)... so I got kind of a bad impression from them. If you're asked to do something, you do it... or else (I mean they're all armed, respect my cousin (luckily enough, cus he wouldn't let anything happen to me) and I feel I got to respect their offers)

I agree, I shouldn't HAVE to drink when I don't want to.
But I feel stupid saying I have a disorder,
especially to THEM... because disorders in my country is something you make fun of

I can't explain it. even I make fun of it.

*just needs time alone on the internet... away from the alcoholic jerks in the same room as her*

DeathBerry:

The worst thing you could do is be passive and continue to surrender to peer pressure out of fear of ridicule or non acceptance. Truth is, if these people cannot understand your need to be responsible and excersise your limits, then you should eagerly refrain from being in the company of them. I've seen this happen to people who have succumbed to the pressure and are now fighting abuse and addiction becuase of it. Dont become another statistic, stay true to yourself, even if it means being alone. There's no fun in being careless, and risking your integrity and self respect for a group of people who have lost thier own integrity and self respect and only seek to take down other's with them. There can be no rewarding approval from people like this and nothing to gain, but everything to lose. If you dont stand for something, you'll fall for anything. Stand tall and good luck

DeathBerry, good luck, not easy. Rogue Mystic wrote some beautiful advice, I think he is right.

Thinking about the best for you! Again, good luck!

Mary

Yes! What I do right now is like... everything I loath. I just feel like such a tiny little girl against 7 older guys. Feels horrible. That's why I stick to the computer, like to shield them off... let them watch stupid movies and leave me (yet, I find a new beer on my desk like every 15th minute)... for the last 20th minute I've gulped lots of beer in my mouth, and spit it out in the toilet (like, telling them you "just got to pee") heh...

I'm trying to shield them out by watching cartoon on my computer. Just not easy when you're the only girl in a room of 10 guys or so

Say no and leave the room or threaten violence. Thats what i do and it works. I personally dont drink or let people drink in my home. Saftey reasoning is cause i have a shelf with semi-automatic weapons and ammunition that is unlocked. No telling what would happen if i or someone got drunk.

Plus i dont like drinking its not worth it.

well... noone owns a gun sweden... BUT EVERYONE GOT MACHETES!

I beat the drinking by eating a LOT, btw. I ate spaghetti, I made noodles, stuffed myself full of raisin bread, lettuce and drank tons of soda. So I didn't get past the tipsy state *satisfied* Now I'm drinking a jumbo-glass of water and eating garlic-spaghetti with some chicken (oh yeah). All the boys are passed out, and I'm watching total recall (I'm telling you... Arnold's BEST ROLE)

Just say no!!!!
Don't be afraid to stick up for yourself.

I'm kind of worried for you, you said it's just you and 10 other boys. Hopefully they are mature and not jerks that will take advantage of you when you have had more than what your small frame can tolerate. Have you thought about having girl friends over also, that way you won't be the only girl.

Best wishes and think about putting what's best for you first!!!! Good luck!!!

You can always raise your tolerance (lowers your health though).

You could just drink the beers really slowly.

I guess I'm late to this one but DB...c'mon now...you're an adult and a grown woman and you stated that its your place....you're too smart for this...tell the young 'uns its time to go home or find some other place to drink because the party is over. You're allowing yourself to be made uncomfortable, ill, used and potentionally in danger for what? Politeness? Friendship? Tell your cousin how you feel, if he's your friend then he will respect you, dismiss the party and take more care with your safety, health and well-being. You're a strong, smart woman regardless of your size or disablity...next time tell 'em to go the fuck home.

Nice words 22, Thats definatly the way to go

I agree with 22 DB, tell them to kiss your ass, and if they want to be drunken morons, go do it somewhere else, they'll get over it...

i know its to late but for future reference i agree with skep and tu tu

Well, made my cousin kick them out in the end
he's a big guy, he looks out for me

thanks for all the advices, I really appreciate them

i know i speak for everyone when i say no problem berry

Just make sure they're not so drunk (Or even you) that they might take advantage of you sexually.

Be careful.

Hey Death! Before I started my climb on the French Fry Tech. ladder, I was a bartender in a whiskey bar.I have observed just about every type of peer pressure there is.
I understand how you feel, so sit down, let me mix you a drink and lets iron this thing out...............T:D

If someone is going to pressure you into doing something that you do not want to then they in my opinion are worthless puppets who needs someone else to join them.


If you don`t feel like driking then don`t it`s that simple!

That's why I'm gonna hang out with my boyfriend til summer vacation is over